American Horror Story FreakShow : Magical Thinking Thoughts

As always, lots of spoilers!

I've come to accept that American Horror Story will always be disjointed and scrambled so I've given up on plot lines and any real resolutions. Hell, I still have a mountain of questions from "Coven!"

However, I'm along for the ride on the FreakShow merry-go-round and with only two episodes left, I'm not looking for anything but an entertaining slice-and-dice finale.

The writers of AHS: FREAKSHOW likely had no idea that the character of Dandy would have such a huge cult following. Although people loved Twisty, the character of Dandy has taken psychopath love to new heights. And I'm right on that bandwagon myself. So even though we've been going nuts waiting to get a Dandy "fix" again after three weeks, he wasn't even in the episode until almost halfway through. Before he showed up, I was getting depressed that it would be like the last episode with Pepper, no Dandy at all. But yes, he was there, scheming away.

I've been trying to decipher why "regular" folk are falling in love with creepy killer Dandy. I don't have to figure out my own personal love for him; I'm a horror writer and have had handsome/beautiful psychopaths in several of my stories and have a weakness for bad boys as my romantic history can attest. And he bathes in blood! Gotta love him!

However, lucky for Finn Wittrock, the rest of the world loves this creepy psycho too! I'm sure his acting card will be filled for years to come. I'm not familiar with his other work, yet, though I fully intend to get acquainted with it. I do find it interesting in my own little mind that he was on All My Children, the only soap I ever watched, which I watched for about twenty years, but stopped several years ago. Obviously I've never seen him on it. And with him in Angelina Joilie's new movie, his starvation days are likely now safely behind him. And if anyone ever makes my novella, Captured Souls (Samhain Horror, 2014), into a movie, I want Finn Wittrock to play Specimen One, who is not a psychopath but he's an egotistical writer being held captive by one!

Dandy's storyline is great fun and any actor would likely love to play him. Finn's nuances are fabulous. Since I've had my own real life run-ins with psychopaths, I have to say he does a great job. His mood swings, the bursting into tears at the drop of a hat, his maniacal smiles, his quivering lip petulance, the man-child innocence, and of course, working out in his underwear, are all very well done. So far, he's not turned Dandy into a crazy cartoon, and likely, this is why we've all fallen in love with him.

Not a lot of guys could pull off that crazy fur coat on the merry-go-round either, but Dandy-Finn does! As soon as I find a good picture from that scene, I'll put it up here.

I found a Dandy-Finn coat picture!

Okay, enough of my Dandy-thoughts. With two episodes left, I have some comments to make.

Why did we waste the first ten (?) minutes of the episode with Jimmy and the hand amputations? We already knew there were two lobster hands in the jar from weeks ago. All we needed to know was if they were in fact  Jimmy's or a relative's. Since we already knew he lost them both, it wasn't a surprise or even a horror. Also, Jimmy was painted as somewhat savvy in this series yet he was easily hoodwinked for this horrific amputation.

I guess instead of Jimmy using lobster hands, he can use those stumps to please the ladies...

If Esmeralda saw his hands and fainted in the other episode, why didn't she rush to the jail to see if he was okay, even though she was getting the Ma Petite jar? I guess she'll go see him in the next episode.

I have no idea why Elsa sold the circus to Chester. Does he have a thousand dollars? He looks like he doesn't have one dollar! Did they have a payment plan? Yes, I understand that she thinks he's "well-heeled" yet on the other hand, she was creeped out by him as well and could have pulled the contract.

The whole twins suddenly deciding they don't need diaries any more was weird. And the whole losing their virginity quest was odd too in a way, although both the girls have fallen in love with others; one with Jimmy, the other with Dandy. Yet neither one even thought about their "loves" during any of this! And why weren't they utterly creeped out by Chester and his doll, although I suppose you sort of have to get it where you can when you have two heads. A threesome/foursome with the twins, Jimmy and Dandy would be way more delicious than with Chester and his creepy doll!


When Dandy's PI tells him how the twins were frolicking with the ventriloquist, Dandy's really bummed out. And we feel sorry for him. And we fear for Chester. Dandy really had the hots for one of the girls, if not both!

Sure enough, Dandy takes Chester's precious Marjorie and taunts him about it. It would be way too easy for Dandy to just kill Chester. Dandy is a psychopath and is going to have a good time playing cat and mouse until he finally kills him. If he does. Maybe Chester will kill Dandy.

Is sawing the twins in half Dandy's spiteful idea? Did he plant the idea in Marjorie's/Chester's head? Is Marjorie really just a little doll on the stage that Chester hears speaking to him at the end of the episode? Did Dandy hire someone to act like the doll to instruct Chester to kill the twins? But if Chester hears the doll and then if someone is acting like the doll, will there be two dolls? If Dandy put the doll on the stage in the big top, he obviously has a plan. He wouldn't just give the doll back so that's why the ending is confusing.

What happened to the two-headed puppet that Dandy made of mom and the Tupperware lady? Is it rotting and collecting flies somewhere now that he has no servants to clean up after him? Is his mansion a mess now? Did he hire new staff? Has anyone noticed mom's not around?

Has he used up all his bathing blood? Does he need more? Is there a fly problem at the mansion?

Dandy has one of the best scenes in the episode (again). When the PI is telling him about how Chester murdered his wife and lover, Dandy's expression and comment is priceless and already the stuff of a thousand memes. "What a sicko!" and then he gets all child-like with glee. "Tell me, how did they die?"

I don't doubt that there will be a big Dandy/Chester showdown, literally. If Chester knew that Dandy wanted to be an actor, he likely could have bargained with him for a part in the circus since Chester now owns it. Or Chester could sell Dandy the circus and then Dandy could have the twins as pets again! But of course, Chester doesn't know that Dandy has it in for him or even who Dandy is. Chester went from kind of normal chameleon lover salesman to bat-shit crazy in forty minutes. Good job, Neil Patrick Harris.

So, two episodes to go! I can't wait to see what happens next.

Let me know your thoughts and predictions in the comments!